The Retirement Plan (2023)
Retirement can be a real killer.
I don’t like the cold, because it’s cold. I’m far more a hot weather person, so surrounded out there by snow, I can’t help but think of somewhere warmer, and it just so happens I have a movie that set somewhere a bit warmer. Not only is it warmer, but it’s also got two actors I enjoy watching in all manner of movies - both Nicolas Cage and Ron Pearlman. Heck, it’s even got a little Ernie Hudson in there! Tonight we hit the tropics, it’s time for The Retirement Plan.
The title describes the actual reason for the movie’s plot - A guy gets it in his head that by stealing a “hard drive” from some bad folks that they’ll be able to retire from driving around the bad men and get him and his family out somewhere new with a clean slate. Obviously, it goes horribly wrong, and the family needs to get out of there while he finishes things up - which also goes wrong. The kid gets sent on to the tropical lands her absent grandfather supposed lives on, the father gets caught before he can do the drop off, and the mother gets caught before she can get on the plane that had room for her. Thus begins the adventure of trying to get the drive from the daughters backpack (where it was hidden by the mother), only to find out that old man grandpa has a certain batch of special skills that these clueless crooks aren’t ready to compete with.
Actors do a good job here. Cage is doing his less-crazy job here, keeping plenty elements of camp and high entertainment value without going so nuts that we end up feeling like it’s totally out of place and over the top. The side actors all do a decent job here, playing into the surprise or incompetence of the criminal element that gives some pretty good laughs at times. It might not be exactly award winning seriousness and deliveries, but they all fit the movie atmosphere fine and in turn feel appropriate. Probably the weakest moment of acting is the kid waking up towards the start of the movie, but from there everyone gets it pretty solid. Actor chemistry is actually pretty solid here as well, particularly between one of the criminals and the kidnapped kid, who you almost root for a turn of sides by the end.
The characters themselves aren’t anything super crazy, especially on the criminal front. Outside of the one criminal, there’s no real necessary depth to them. The gramps has some mystery about him, and the interactions between him and granddaughter and him and daughter do provide some level of growth or relation. There’s also all sorts of levels of “inside man” going on past the three-person family unit, and by the end it’s pretty darn clear whose working for who and who knows what. All that James Bond nonsense is background to the main family’s struggle to get out of the situation they are in, even though it’s also technically the cause of all of it. Really though, characters and actors do a good enough job that the movie is entertaining and you’ll probably like a handful of them, so I’d say everything here is pretty well done good enough in my book!
Dead tired.
Costumes are pretty modern, so there isn’t really too much to stand out here. It blends in nicely with modern times, so it nails it in that regard. Most the baddies are snazzily dressed, because you can’t be a crime mobster type without looking classy. The settings are a bit nice to look at with plenty of outside beach-like areas and boat docks. It would be a pretty decent sales pitch for a vacation, although perhaps not with the body count if one were to take movie events as guaranteed happenings. The effects that go along with all the costumes are decent enough. Yes, at times they won’t be quite the convincing blood pool or whatever - but honestly I’ve seen worse - but it also has some good ones in there to balance out the ones that aren’t as impressive.
The fights, when they break out, are both well done and also contain some humorous moments as well. It’s a pretty good mix where it’s never something as hardcore as John Wick but it also doesn’t quite spin out into a Jackie Chan near-slapstick levels of action either. It still delivers fun however, and some interesting moments as far as how things play out. It’s also largely not overly gory with it’s violence. That said, it does still have the violence like i previously mentioned, and it does vary in levels of movie convincing. I should mention that although there is action scenes, it’s not a constant action fest either - usually following the setup of a fight or encounter breaking up larger stints of conversations and phone calls between the web of characters.
Audio is there, and in typical me fashion I don’t recall most the music afterwards. There’s some normal songs used in there on occasion, so some may be more stuck in peoples heads than it did for me. Still, the music does a good job of doing what it usually does in movies - add to the overall scene or mood. Line deliveries are pretty good, although I will say that I feel there was a few lines that were a bit quiet for me to hear great despite not thinking they were meant to be super duper quiet. It’s overall largely fine when it comes to audio, and probably fairs far better than the effects department when it comes to things not pulling people out of the movie. I’m sure there’s also some commentary in here people could make an argument for - things like being a good parent or keeping your word, judging books by their covers and trusting stuff. I’m sure you could also tell me that it’s not all intentional, although some of it the movie itself calls out as well. It certainly doesn’t strike me as the thinking persons movie, more geared towards just having a good time - much like someone who may be swinging on out to the islands to retire.
Bonus cool actor.
I had fun here. I won’t lie and say it’s the best movie I’ve ever seen, but it had a good mix of stuff going on. It had decent acting, some better chemistry in some spots than I would have expected even. The story worked for letting everything happen, and you could see the setup for the humor coming, but it still didn’t stop the execution of them from being funny. Actions good, the movie is put together good, and it really doesn’t overstay it’s welcome. It might be some dark times in the sunny islands, but for the viewer it’s all good punches and amused laughs.