In space, everyone can read your opinions.
The Rock vs the rock we know as Earth? I'll watch it - in fact I did watch it just before writing this. Put on your disaster goggles but set your mind to action-flick, cause this promises to be a bumpy ride. I'm sure I could shake out a few more earthquake jokes, but let's just tumble on over to the main part and see if the movie was a disaster or it really rocks.
Read MoreSomebody went and put Sam Jackson in charge of the country! Initially drawn to the over-the-top cover art (because with all the movies out there, sometimes that's the easiest way to pick), this little flick promised me a young Finnish boy promising the black president from a bunch of terrorists hunting him. Sounds good doesn't hit? Well, let's continue on to figure out if this stag has a remarkable number of antlers, or was really just a bear waiting to maul us.
Read MoreBe thankful that the world hasn't ended in nuclear fire. Be thankful you don't have methodical killing machines from the future sent back in time to kill you because of your unborn child. Be thankful that you haven't been met with a glaring amount of discontented reviews and insulted outcry from internet critics. Be thankful, for you haven't yet had the necessity to understand a time travel tale so much more complex than you should have had to yet. Or, you know, you could be thankful that their is no fate and I'm bringing you this review, because somewhere deep down, you know you wanted it.
Read MoreWe just did something on the water, so why not follow it up with something UNDER the water? Yeah yeah. it's a lame connection, but it'll do for this week. This flick promises aliens and underwater mystery, so it could go as terribly wrong as the situation for the characters in the movie. Let's dive into the picture and see just how much it does or does not sink.
Read MoreMost people would expect me to do a V movie to capitalize on the weekly movie landing on the 5th of November, but quite frankly although the movie had some great quotable quotations, I didn't enjoy it as much as some others did. Since that's that, I instead opted to do a different movie with plenty of gunpowder and memorable moments - one that I enjoy enough to watch on a yearly basis anyways. So this 5th of November, don't bother asking about a treason or plot, but instead ask yourself "What would Jack Burton do?"
Read MoreI can either sell you on- or turn you away from- this movie with just one name: Mel Brooks. Really, in all honesty, I could just end it there, as most people already know if they'd want to watch it based off of that, but what about that strange breed of folk who don't know who Mel is? I know, it's unthinkable to those who know of him, but let's face it - the times, they keep on rolling. Being that it's October, it's time for an actual reasonable reason to pop out a bunch of horror movies (outside of just "I want to watch them") as I can just go "but spooky ghouls and ghosts and costumes!" Don't worry though, I decided to start it off easy this year by doing a movie more comedy than horror, so let's see if you can handle what the season gave me reason to show, or if this month is going to leave you without a ghost of a chance!
Read MoreBefore we got a number four and everyone flipped their collective lids. After we had already gotten two outrageously fun adventures to set up a formula to expect. Right when it was decided that Sean Connery needed to be injected in our favorite "archaeologist" was this movie. The Last Crusade would probably strike as a weird choice to review first - namely since the logical person would expect reviews of the first two - but I've never necessarily been one to really care which movie in a series comes up as an opinion piece, primarily because I've seen them myself before and really just write these up on a whatever-I-watch weekly basis. Crack your whip and get your fedora, it's time for some Indiana!
Read MoreI'm not a big musical person. Most people who know me know that - and it's not just a matter of I auto-tune (ha ha, funny!) out when I go to them or whatever. No, I give them as fair a shot as any movie I would watch - it's just for whatever reason most of them don't end up being my thing. Some people just can't get enough singing in their lives though - I'm sure Glee's success is a testament to that. Will Horrors manage to satisfy their hunger, or turn out to be plant food?
Read MoreWhen I say Mortal Kombat, the first thing that pops to most peoples minds would be a series of 'wicked' violent fighting games that had super cool finishing moves and a dude that yells "GET OVER HERE!" Others may remember the string of movies that it had - you know, all two of them - and others still (like, maybe one person) might remember more still. Well, trip that nostalgia up, cause tonight's fine delicacy is best served with a basting of blo- wait a minute, pg-13? Did this movie just Finish itself before the fight even started?
Read MoreRemember when you were super excited about the Lord of the RIngs? Remember when you slowly lost touch with The Hobbit? Well, this is the third one - the "defining chapter" if you will. The end of one tale begins the beginning of the next. Surely, with a title like The Battle of the Five Armies there will at least be more combat action than ever seen in Game of Thrones right? Well, let's delve into the furry footed thief story, and see if it re-inspires everyone to read, or if you will end up wishing there was only one movie trilogy in Middle-Earth.
Read MoreWhat's the most generic thing associated with ghosts? Give you a hint - beyond "haunting" it's most likely the title of this movie. Now, something like this could go great - could go horribly, horribly wrong as well. I mean, what better excuse to have some other-worldly activity that a board of letters that functions by most accounts as a ungodly portal into that which shouldn't be tampered with? What foul demons and lovable Caspers will be summoned from somebody's generically naive actions? Will the movie game with your emotions, or would you rather see it burnt for the horrible time you had viewing it?
Read MoreHow many times now have we seen the story of Dracula? If I wanted to pan further, I could say 'how many times have we seen the story of the vampire?" And no, I don't mean that badly written worse filmed absent-minded Twilight series. If I wanted to induce vomiting, I would talk about the soundtrack to Nosferatu, which is at least a respectable movie. Back on topic though - we've seen it a lot. Most of us would probably agree at this point that the best rendition of Dracula is probably the Bram Stoker's variant, but Bella did have himself one mean stare. Well, a new age, a new generation, a new attempt at trying to bring back the old monster movies that I really can't be too mad about because I like the old monster movies. Should Dracula have staid untold, or will the movie nipping at your neck have you all hot and bothered?
Read MoreThis is one of the movies that I feel me doing this for is pretty much a waste. I mean, let's face it, anyone who wants to see this movie has already seen this movie. At this point, the only reason anyone is going to read this is because they either want to know my opinion on something they've already seen, or because they've accidentally come here looking for Avengers 2 reviews. I guess just for my own ego, I'm going to pretend its the earlier reason and not the latter, but lets flash back and figure out if someone should be seeking to avenge this movie, or to avenge our wallets.
Read MoreHercules. We have all heard the tale - be it through secondary means like Jason and the Argonauts, the Kevin Sorbo show, or even the Disney movie. At this point, one need ask themselves what more can they possibly tell of Hercules? Well, how about making him more human and casting him as Dwayne The Rock Johnson? Will it get you pumped enough to flip houses, or will it leave you wishing it was a little more mythical?
Read MoreI'd be crazy not to love action movies. Simple, straightforward, mind numbing scenes of glorious action and explosions? You know what really sets apart action movies for me though? One liners. Yes, choreography and cool guns and gadgets are important to make all that helter-skelter understandable in the mind, but one liners are the thing that stays with me longest. I can more easily recall "I'll be back" from Terminator than I can vividly recall any specific scene (although I can recall some of those too). In the case of Expendables however, we come into three off the back of 2 - which was in most people's minds a rather less than stellar follow up to the first nostalgia filled riot, excluding Chuck Norris of course. Can 3 bring the boys back in town while upping the ante, or is the series proving the longer it goes just how expendable it is?
Read MoreI watch this movie at least once a year, it's in my favored circulation. There's many a reason for this that we can get to later one, just as there are reasons that it's not the perfect movie by definition - although I think we could all argue that the perfect movie in reality isn't the flawless one, but the one that we can overlook all it's shortcomings because it's just that much fun. Can this Captain Planet of movies prove elemental to having fun, or will it just be that other sci fi flick with the cast of people you know from other movies?
Read MoreNananananananana Nananananananana Batman! Before I continue with my pre-spiel here, might I reflect to you how crazy it is that we live in a time when auto-correct on PC's will actually properly relocate the spaces necessary for the old Adam West Batman theme? Seriously, I guess I know I at least had the right number of nana's in there, ha! Anyways, in a long running tradition of watching non-Christmas Christmas movies, I bring to you another flick that fits the bill, featuring everyones favorite superhero - Batman! Before he got super serious and swallowed a truck full of gravel, before it was decided that nipples needed to be placed on all the male suits, but after the televised version that contained onomatopoeia, there was the Michael Keaton run of Batmans. In this sequel to his first foray as the dark knight, can he triumphantly return to the top of your interests, or will it be the movie you deserve but not want?
Read MoreJackie Chan! Yeah! I know there's folks out there (due to pure statistical probabilities alone) that balk at the idea of watching Jackie Chan movies, but I like the guy. Sure, some movies are cooler than others, and some of them haven't been available till long after the fact here (which has lead to a bit of misleading time-frames in titles), but I've generally not had him in a movie that I regretted watching. Hadn't heard of City Hunter before, so I thought it would be a good chance to check it out, you know? Hopefully it delivers a city-worth of enjoyment and doesn't leave me hunting for my alarm clock.
Read MoreI like anime. It doesn't always crop up in movies though, as I feel the vast majority of it is actually pretty well serial based as opposed to movie based. That being said, with a title like Legend of the Millennium Dragon, I couldn't resist. Dragons, and legends? How could it go wrong? Well, we'll just need to find out if its a legendary experience or just one of those movies that drag on
Read MoreYeah, sure, the newest Call of Duty has exo-suits and laser guns - but Edge of tomorrow teased delicious mechanically enhanced soldiers before I remember them doing it - and I'd be willing to put my money down on EoT not being as derivative as well. Been a while since Tom Cruise was out there in a sci fi flick eh? Not really, but I kind of feel that's generally what he does well anyways, so that's not holding me back either. Will you end up repeating your viewing experience, or will you just live on like nothing happened?
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