In space, everyone can read your opinions.
Get ready to travel into cinema's past again with me! Come now, it's a fantastic journey to a time when color was shades of black and white, the over-use of all things CG was unimaginable, movie posters were still something of an art. Not to lose out on the October-ly spirit however, this haunting journey back is a bit of a ghost tale. Do you believe in haunted houses, or won't you give them the ghost of a chance?
Read MoreImmerse yourself in the depths of VR! No, that's the wrong Oculus. Check out this eyeball shaped opening! Nope, still the wrong Oculus. Check out this spooky haunted item movie with shiny eyed ghosts who can make you see things! Yeah, now thats the Oculus! Will you come out of this one not believing your eyes, or wishing that you saw something else?
Read MoreI'm sure most peoples introduction to Flash Gordon was it getting mentioned in Ted - unless maybe your a member of the older audience (not like I know the ages of anyone reading this). I mean, just looking at that cover and knowing it's from the 80's (the "remastered edition" for my viewing) tells me everything I need to want to watch it. Why it's taken me so long is anyones guess, but can it live up to my expectations? Well, it's got a title theme done by the one and only Queen, so it's already starting off on a good foot. Can Gordon save us all, or will this movie be but a flash in our memory?
Read MorePeople tell me that Megan Fox is a bad actress, that she's nothing but a pretty face. I honestly don't think she's that bad - I mean, surely no Kurt Russel, but leagues better than Kristen Stewart for sure - but the real test of how good an actor is would be in the breadth of roles they can play. That being said, I've been on a horror movie kick again recently, so tie in seeing how well she can do as a bad guy and the fact that (from the trailers) it's a sex-based monster while not actually having a lot of nude shots and you can color me interested. Granted, the questions always remains as to if the movie's goodness will be all my imagination, or if it's for a good time we should call.
Read MoreHe's the angriest gamer you'll ever know. Youtube browsers may already know who I refer to, and other internet users may have stumbled across the Cinemassacre site a long time ago already, but for those who aren't aware I'm talking about the Angry Video Game Nerd (or AVGN). A long time coming, this movie is a labor of love for the Nerd himself, and hopes to be everything budget-film awesome a lot of the B-flicks he enjoys would love to be (all while fitting into a similar format for the character of the Nerd). I should warn you now: language is a strong thing in the movie (and the reviews), so if you're easily offended by strong words you should probably skip it. That being said, is the movie really an out-of-this-world experience, or would you rather have a buffalo take a diarrhea dump in your ear (I don't expect all of you to get that)?
Read MoreFind yourself with a hankering for a world war 2 flick that's less depressing and war-like? Maybe wish Ocean's Eleven had a smaller cast and was set back in world war 2? Ever feel the burning desire to watch some people thwart Hitler by saving art? Well, today might be your lucky day, as this is exactly what Monuments Men promises! Now all we need to do is figure out we celebrate over the survival of art, or if we rather wish the german guy shot us (I promise you'll get that later).
Read MoreYou know what modern films haven't always done a good job of doing? Parody films. Yeah, we get the occasional one (like Shaun of the Dead) that's phenomenal, but compared to back in the day when Mel Brooks was constantly pumping out quotable riot after riot, it's hard not to miss the glory days. Speaking of the glory days, tonights entry comes right from that sweet spot back in the 1980's, named Ice Pirates. It promises rollicking good fun, space herpie, and even ferocious space possums. Can it truly be a riveting adventure on the rocks, or will it leave us floating in our own disappointment?
Read MoreI saw the first Raid a couple years back - and it was enjoyable. Pretty good action, enough of a plot to hold it together, subtitles - it was a rousing good time, as though someone combined SWAT with the newer Judge Dredd. Having seen some hype going around for a second Raid, I figured it would be in my best interest to check it out. Can this sequel live up to the hype, or did it just pull a Leroy Jenkins?
Read MoreTo me, black and white are just colors. A long while ago, my mother recommended this movie to me, telling me I would have a blast with it and I of course had no reason to doubt her. Being a bit on the aged side, I of course didn't really recognize any of the cast or the likes outside of knowing the name of Cary Grant, so the most I could prejudge it is by the premise of the movie told to me - a premise that sounds absolutely ridiculous. Can this black and white picture have aged like a fine wine, or will we find it to be laced with poison?
Read MoreMr Bean as a spy? This has got to be good. Sometimes you aren't in a serious enough mood for a heavy duty spy movie like James Bond, so why not take a peek into what the best of British intelligence has to offer? Well, now that I mentioned it, will this movie bumble it's adorable way into our hearts, or will our brains wonder how our intelligence just disappeared in such a tuxedo clad way?
Read MoreOh stop your whining, I like watching foreign flicks - those that may or may not emulate some of the stuff we are used to seeing in our hollywood copy-paste lifetimes. Some of the reviews said that this would have some awesome fights, and being an action hungry kind of guy, how could I resist? Add in that it was dubbed so I could take a break from all the reading I've been doing as of late, and it was guaranteed. Can this gang of punks grow on you, or will you rather they be tossed in the gutter?
Read MoreI once bought a sword off of someone I worked with because I recognized it as the FAKK sword. One might then find it odd that the first time I have seen the movie from which it comes was just now. Granted, I had watched the original Heavy Metal long before this, and find went in wondering if it would be more of the same thing, better or worse than what I knew already. Throw on your spikes and lace up your boots, it's time to find out if you'll be banging your head while throwing the horns or just banging it against a wall.
Read MoreI know this may not be a widely-held common thing, but every now and then I just get the desire to watch a SyFy original. Sure, sometimes the movie ends up being pretty dang awesome (like Dog Soldiers) but most the time it's hard to tell if a movie was decent or your expectations were just so low it was hard to be let down in the first place. Well then, this here's a SyFy original movie that's pitch is something so far not too used: What if we took vampires, and put them on a boat? What if we took vampires, and put them under the boat? Can Beast suck the boredom from your veins, or will it just plain suck?
Read MoreMarvel likes making some anime-flavored flicks lately, but I'm not complaining. What character is cool that we don't ever hear anybody shout about not being in a Avengers movie? The Punisher. Who could we team up with the Punisher and have one not seem entirely outclassed? How about Black Widow? Tag team action in an animated form, with a little guest appearance of some the big-wig Avengers themselves! Is it a beautiful elegant thing to steal your breath away, or is it a vengeful executioner whose only plans are to stop you from breathing? Read on and and I'll tell you what I think!
Read MoreI had some apprehension coming into this movie, I'm not going to lie. See, I saw the old robocop before, and it isn't exactly the kind of movie that easily is turned into a non-R rated film while retaining it's unique feel, and that had me a bit worried. At the same time, I've had two separate friends tell me that it was "not too bad," which in my books means at least worth one watch. Would the corporate machine churn out another sub-stellar cash cow reboot, or would the soul find a way to give us a reincarnation of a classic in modern times?
Read MoreAn old movie redone as a SyFy original movie? How could this possibly go wrong, am I right? Hahaha, jokes aside, this is kind of accidental (I had meant to rent the original, and silly me got this one instead), but I haven't shied away from SyFy original movies before and I tend to get some form of amusement from them. The real question is will this boat movie sink like the Titanic, or will it be as electrifying as a Tesla coil?
Read MoreEnder's Game is a pretty big thing as far as books go in the sci fi community from what I'm told - and as is usual with these sorts of things (*ahem*Starship Troopers) I've never bothered to read it. Know what that means? I get to enjoy the movie more than all the folks who already know it from reading, because they tend to get hung up on all the differences or inadequacies that I don't even know about! When it comes to movie adaptations, ignorance truly can be bliss. That being said, I like me some science fiction movies, and heard rather mediocre things from those who went to see it (again, it usually takes some goading to get me to want to throw down that 10 dollars on a theater ticket) - so perfect case of it showing up in the Netflix queue at last. Will Ender make the movie a game to remember, or should the game end after it's first fielding?
Read MoreI've been a fan of knights, swords and steel, armor and wizards since I was a young kid and have just never grown out of it. A coworker I had at one of my past jobs actually recommended this movie to me (unsurprisingly, I find out about many movies from before I was born in this manner), being a man of similar interests (I bought a physical Excalibur off of him to give it a good home), and so I took it upon myself to get it. I've always felt it was a rather long movie (a tad over 2 hours) and in turn it's taken me a long time to get through all of it, but I figured with the Battle of the Nations starting up today, what better time to watch something associated with armor and Arthurian legend? Can this rendition of a well known tale be named king, or is it just a sword stuck in a stone?
Read MoreArach·no·pho·bia: the pathological fear or loathing of spiders. Some people would have you believe that it's a fear without basis - and maybe they are right. I mean, it's not every single spider in existence that can cause death or even harm to a human, so the fear of a little tiny creature that springs on you from nowhere and builds nests to trap it's victims and suck them dry is totally irrational, right? If you haven't figured it out, I'm a tad bit arachnophobic - but I've been working at changing that slowly over the years through sheer willpower. Most people have an awesome story about why they have a fear of spiders, and yet mine is both weak and highly entertaining: I was taken to see this movie when I had no business in theaters. In that sense, it demonstrates the power of movies and the lasting ways they can affect us, and in turn I can't think of any other movie that would make more sense to do for my one hundredth review. Stick around and see if this movie is a web of lies, or if it puts the fear or spiders into you.
Read MoreThe Thing, again! Surprisingly, although you would assume it from the name being the same as Carpenter's earlier version, this one is actually a prequel instead of a remake! Now we get to experience what happened to all those Norwegians at the hand of our creepy extraterrestrial friend. Granted, I'm gonna spin this a bit - we are gonna start this thing off with an approach where it's all it's own movie (as though you haven't seen the other Thing), and then get into how it ties into it afterwards. So what'll it be? The perfect copy, or just a cheap imitation.
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