Jingle All the Way (1996)
Two Dads, One Toy, No Prisoners
Over the years it’s been pretty obvious that I’m not a big Christmas movie kind of person. At the very least, my string of “Holiday-adjacent” movies stands out as making that point for me - but I’ve got that secret first-hand knowledge of what I’m thinking so maybe it’s not as externally apparent. There’s something about the particular breed of cheer from holiday-centric movies that just tends to make me loose a bit of interest, but for today’s movie I think we’ll throw down some spirit with a pair of good tidings - one of the greatest action stars of all time and my favorite comedian of all time, teaming up to not team up and make a movie about the Christmas that almost wasn’t. Get your reindeer drunk, tonight we Jingle All the Way.
The story is one that we all know as the subset of Christmas movies - the parent who isn’t spending enough time with the family and letting the kid down, causing tensions and a desperate attempt to make it up to them (usually involving a particular gift) for the Holiday. Here, we add in a co-pilot slash enemy in the mailman character, whose also looking to score the gift for his own kid - both similar situations even though we technically are only meant to root for our main character. Of course, there’s some side stuff in there - the misadventures of the main as he goes on this toy-quest as well as this entire sub-story about the neighbor bachelor who seems to just be a little too familiar with all the ladies in town trying to likewise get familiar with the main’s wife. Yeah - you don’t really expect that in there, and for the most part it probably flies over the younger crowds knowing, but wowzers.
So let’s get real here - most of these holiday movies are less about the actual story and more about morals right? Like, yeah, things are happening to tell a story and give people purpose, but it’s usually more about that Anti-grinch cheer for everyone message about being good to each other for goodness sake. Here, we get that workaholic dad that has to come to terms with the fact he’s missing too much of his family-time and needs to put a little more effort in to back up how much he loves them. Although he goes to some extreme lengths - including fighting a pack of Santas - to try and get the doll, the Christmas message comes round in the end when it ends up not even being the doll, but simply that the kid want’s his dad keeping his promises. It’s a bit of a “I have the real X at home” situation, further cementing that giving nature of the holiday that can make is so sickeningly sweet.
In this movie’s particular case though, I’m not here for the framing device or the morals, I’m here for some jokes and a good time. Let me tell you, it’s got some jokes. As always, let’s get the disclaimer of comedy being subjective out of the way so that we can now get into what you’ll be looking at. We’ve got plenty of sight gags, slapstick in spades, situational moments, a hand full of puns or one liners - pretty much everything shy of a poop joke. Mileage will always vary, but I had a good time with it revisiting it now, particularly with most the slapstick moments - like everyone hating on poor Booster. The sloshed reindeer, the adult-level jokes might not be for everyone, but as a whole it’s a good time and should at least merit a chuckle.
Power Man: Turbo Rangers
Actors can help with the jokes. Overall, the acting isn’t really horrible in any given spot, although the weakest link is certainly the kiddos in this one. Sometimes the actors lend themselves to the comedy - such as a few of the sight gags with Arnold - and sometimes they just get to add it in there with the way they say things. My boy Sinbad doesn’t really get any huge stand-up moments, and a good portion of his more rant moments are less comedy straight forward and more funny because tinfoil hats, if that. Still, he has a few good moments as well, in particular a few bomb moments and how they play out. The supporting cast are all good, even if the main comedy comes from the two leads, and the neighbor-wife relationship is every bit as awkward as you would expect when someone isn’t getting the same messages as the other.
The characters aren’t exactly anything to write home about. The only one with real growth is the main - and it’s debatable how much of that would actually stick around and how much he really learned by the end anyways. Just because the movie points out the importance of being around doesn’t really mean the characters get it fully, you know? Still, it is quite weird how often you notice that he difference between a bad guy and a good guy in old movies is simply which one they want you to root for. Both the lead characters are in a similar situation of trying not to let their kid down - arguably, more people could associate with the underpaid mistreated mail worker than the actual hero - so the silver lining of the ending ends up being a bit of a twisted situation if you think too hard on it.
Effects work is pretty good here. Yes, most the time costumes are pretty modern-ish so nothing really stands out too much in that regard. That said, we do have a Santa-gang, we do get all the parade floats, a reindeer with a practical stand in head, and plenty of antic-related things like a bomb explosion. Largely, the main bulk is probably the ending parade scene, where we get some actual Turboman action - well, outside of the Power Rangers style TV show with Turbo in it, but beyond all of that it’s pretty good looking with perhaps the exception of some of the flying scene. Look, I’m not going to be too hard on it because I’ve seen far worse movies that were trying to be good, but it’s also not some kind of effects-heavy Nightmare either. It plays it pretty limited for the most part, but at least what’s there is pretty good.
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I enjoy this movie enough for what it is - and if you are more fond of holiday movies than me you’ll probably enjoy it even more than that. It’s got plenty of slapstick and jokes to carry it as a comedy, but works in it’s more Christmas themed elements as you’d expect from any old seasonal flick. Although it might not nail it’s sentimentality as well as a more dedicated classic like White Christmas, it’s at least far more entertaining (at least in my opinion) than the more drama-heavy holiday renditions that pop out of the Hallmark channel. It’s also not as frustratingly over-played as A Christmas Story. You want a good time that’s holiday coated that’s not going to make you grumpy for watching it? Check this one out and don’t be a grinch.