On this little gem of a page, you can find my "reviews" for movies! As far as the reviews go, expect me to give the movie a fair go regardless of if it's an adaptation or original idea - although if I am familiar with the source, you can expect me to chime i on that as well. I've also provided amazon links at the end of each review, so if you see a movie you want to pick up you can provide a kickback to help the site keep trucking.
Search for genres (horror, sci fi) using this button.
View the Title List by clicking the clapper image to see movies by title (assuming its been reviewed). If you know a specific movie, use the search bar to speed things up. You can also click on a MPAA Rating bar to bring up a selection of 20 movies from my comrade TPBM and I each of that Rating. I'm looking into getting the limit to be expanded by my provider though, so don't stress too much, okay?
Now I know what you are thinking folks - why isn’t he doing the other “get to mars” movie? Well, primarily I wanted to give a little bit of breathing room between the two and a more fight-oriented movie was requested for tonight to go along with the Chinese food dinner that was getting dropped off. Far be it from me to turn down requests from providers of food, so I threw out three options from the back log and “the one with the train” ended up winning out. Get ready for a ride on the murder train, tonight’s flick earns it’s name Kill.
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Today begins an experiment, or rather is an excuse for an experiment. The idea of playing with memories is a bit tangential to the overall thought of the experiment, and so tonight’s movie is oddly fitting. I found myself asking a question at one point while watching movies with prequels and remakes, and perhaps through experimentation with a small groups size we can come up with a bit of a working hypothesis. How much are our tastes dependent on which thing - be it original, reboot, or sequel - we see first? Does nostalgia of time play more a role than the actual quality of a movie? Tonight we begin to try and unravel this simple and honestly stupid question, as I try to remember things I forgot. Keep a grasp on reality, tonight we look at the reboot of Total Recall.
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I originally watched this forever ago but why not watch it again now? You wouldn’t know that I set it up as a layup from the last movie choice that also happened to have thieves in the title - probably because i didn’t - but if I didn’t tell you that right there you’d probably assume I was some kind of thematical mastermind or something. Although I do enjoy making me a plan, and usually a backup plan when that plan inevitably fails, I can claim nothing but just dumb chance on that, so for tonight’s mouthful of a movie we are going to go and re-watch something I haven’t done on here yet, as well as something that I’ve played and read for some good time. You ready to be all nerdy? Tonight we are watching Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves.
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Time for a sequel episode! We did the original a while back - honestly I forgot about most of the details, but I remember crime drama shenanigans, people being horrible family members, and a long Heat style gunfight chase at the end. It took me part of the way through tonights movie to remember that one character was even in the last movie, which was pretty funny - but with how I constantly forget things, it’ll be pretty amusing to figure out just how much it impacts the overall enjoyment and following of tonight’s flick. Get your sheriff badge out and wonder which side you want to be on, tonight we look at Den of Thieves 2.
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I’ve been seeing an absolute ton of headlines just trashing a recent movie lately, so of course I’m automatically interested in it. Since it’s out on Netfilx, it also means there is no barrier to entry for me watching it, since I already have that subscription. Is this thing as bad as it would seem, or is it another case of people experimenting with “negative opinions get more clicks?” I can’t say for sure, because I didn’t click a single one of those headlines - but I sure can check the movie out. Grab your nostalgia pants and plug in your extension cord, tonight we watch The Electric State.
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Turn around, see a movie from way back. Yeah, I wrote one sentence with a sing-song thought in mind but it’s over already. Anyways, we going back to a movie that’s probably caused an entire movie some trauma, and yet somehow still ends up feeling remarkably potent in relevance despite it’s age. We got costumes and props and all sorts of kid actors, in a true book of unending potential. Tonight, we pull out The NeverEnding Story.
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On today’s episode of “I swear I’ve done this” we feel like we are stuck in an eternal loop of doing the same things while eating a pizza that tastes like a cheeseburger. Tonights movie is one I watched a while ago - and honestly would have sworn I did during my stint of hard-pushing through a lot of found footage movies in search of the good ones. I feel like that seems like an impossible feat for some, but there are some that are legitimate shinning samples of what the genre really could be if a bit of effort was thrown into them. Now, I will state before hand that tonight’s flick is going to require a lot of reading for those who don’t know Norwegian - so if you aren’t in the mood for a little reading, perhaps it’s not the night for you to check it out. For the rest of us however, be rewarded by my Monster Hunter Wilds fueled desire to watch some man versus something real big, tongiht we visit (apparently for it’s first time on here) Troll Hunter.
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Brand brand brand new movie today. How new? Just dropped today as far as I know - at least in my region. I was debating what I was gonna do, but this made it easy - an action romp that feels like an anime? Yeah, we’ll postpone all the joke stuff until next week when I’m probably less energetic - tonight we walk into a city of human monsters, tonight we watch Demon City.
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I’m exhausted tonight. so I’ve picked a movie that is both low brain power requirements and also set somewhere that looks so much warmer than the crap cold outside. It even ended up starting a franchise - although how good of a thing that is will probably depend on who you ask. The main actor really loved the character if nothing else, so regardless of who else might like it he’s got his own back for sure. Hope you aren’t afraid of the dark, tonight we are watching Pitch Black.
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Valentines day is around the corner, and the easy way out for tonight’s review would be to pick some romcom to do. Really, Princess Bride is pretty much hands down the best romance movie around, and we’ve already done that - so instead of sitting myself through something that I, as a horror and action coded dude, would rather not watch I found myself a nice little improvisation. Actually, I found a different one that I had thought about but then found this one as something I didn’t need to spend cash to watch and reoriented to this one instead. We’ve got romance, we’ve got troubles, and we’ve got plenty of action to rock and roll to. It’s some time for spy versus spy, tonight we hit up Mr. & Mrs. Smith.
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Blast from the past time, because we like doing that as old people. Who am I calling old? Me and this movie really, but how bad is that really? The cartoon a bunch of us grew up, turned into a live action movie that was good enough to get some sequel action. In a funny twist, it’s one of the few things that came back and tried to “grow with it’s original audience” that still felt largely like what it was - but was that a good or bad thing? Grab your snacks and hide from ghosts, tonight we visit Scooby-Doo.
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Today we try something new. Today we are going to write this entire review from my phone as I wait for the car place to replace a part so my car will pass it's inspection. Yeah, I'll still record audio at home, but I might as well make good use of my three hours of waiting for my wallet to get mugged. Thankfully for me, me and a buddy already watched a movie the other night, so let's check out a movie that sends like it had a budget that's probably pretty comparable to what in getting charged : tonight we watch Fall.
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Many choices are available at all times to watch when it comes to movies. Old ones, new ones, grungy ones, family friendly ones, and ones with and without fart jokes. The variety of options has never in fact been better to date, and until some media armageddon happens which causes the loss of all media, that statement will technically always be true regardless of when it’s read. You could say that statement itself is immortal. Yeah, there’s the segue, for there in fact can only be one - tonight we watch Highlander.
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Hey look, my name is in the tagline of the movie! I’m famous! I’m just joking of course, but as a dude who wakes up to Ken’s theme from Street Fighter, me making such a stupid quip should be expected. I decided that I need a burst of color and bubble for the day after spending most of it feeling just plain tired (I’m starting to think science is lying about that whole only needing 7 hours of sleep thing) - so I found the most brightly colored thing stored in my “To Watch” list. Yeah, that’s right, tonight is fantastic because life is plastic, we’re going to check out Barbie.
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So nice I’ll do it twice! That’s just me energetically saying that I’m doing another movie where I felt like I’ve already done the movie but all proof states otherwise. Originally, I wanted something of a fantasy movie tonight - like a old sword and sandals or something like that. After looking for something that fit the mood and discovering that the modern definition of a “fantasy” movie pertains to everything including Godzilla apparently, I abandoned that idea and went for this one instead. Get ready for a dose of computer aided violent action as the shadows come alive - tonight we watch Ninja Assassin.
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It’s a brand new year - is it a brand new you? If you’ve been around enough, you may remember me mentioning that I do some charity streaming and like to theme it - last year was giant robots, on of those things that I love but not everyone sees the draw to, making it kind of hard to find fitting movies. This year, I was going to be running through some of the Mass Effect games - but I could have done the animated movie for that but it’d be a bit on the nose so I decided to do something that’s a little last year and a little this year instead. Let’s combine my constant memory-loss ridden feature of having thought I already did a movie with a science fiction blast that has bad guys that start with an R. Yeah, buckle up space cowboys, tonight we are going back and re-watching (we both know we’ve all seen it plenty) Serenity.
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Time to get handsy. Yeah, it’s a crap pun, but whatever they all can’t be bangers. So, this one I saw the cover art for over on amazon and went “that could be cool” - expecting it to be a animated movie. Well, turns out it was not an animated movie, but it is still a wire-fu flick so I got part of it right right? Bring out your subtitles, tonight we check out (as titled on Amazon anyways) Buddha Palm.
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Although if I had to list my favorite spirits Christmas wouldn’t be the most fitting one for me, I feel like it’s getting close enough that I can pop a winter movie here or there and snot suffer too much. I mean, some of them are actually really good movies even if you didn’t like the holiday itself - and then some of them are cookie cutter flicks that you can’t tell apart, as with anything else in cinema really right? Well then, here’s one of Amazon’s newest pitches for the week - one that I was suprised to see streaming on Prime without me needing to do any rental or purchase option, as I had thought it was still in theaters or just got to be in theaters - sometimes I love it when there’s options! Anyways, like the gift of letting me watch a movie from home, let’s unwrap this present and mystery as to whose stealing Santa for Christmas in Red One.
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I could pick a nice winter themed movie since it’s winter, but instead I picked something with bugs. Why? Honestly, because I watched it forever ago so in theory it makes the review part a lot quicker to do. Well, that and who knows, maybe it’ snot as bad as I remember it being. Everyone remembers the first movie, some of us have read the book and wondered how the two could end up being so functionally different - and a bunch of us must have watched the second movie because they gave us a third - and movie companies don’t do that if they don’t think they’ll make money. Funny part is, you never hear anyone talking about two or three - so heck with it, tonight we jump back into the front and watch Starship Troopers 2.
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